Contrary to what you’ve heard your whole life (and what I’ve heard my whole life) “venting” and talking about your problems isn’t your best option. Let me share a few reasons why:
- Each time you talk about your issue you relive it all over again. Have you ever told someone about something bad that happened to you and found yourself getting upset and maybe even angry all over again, as you were telling the story? It was bad enough that you had to go through it. How many times do you want to retell that story and repeat that vibrational history? Have you ever had someone tell you about their troubles, then hours later they were still telling that same story to other people? It’s really a waste of their mental and emotional energy.
- You keep the problem active. You’ve probably heard that “you get what you think about.” Or “what you think about you bring about.” Or “as a man thinketh so is he.” You get the idea. Keep your thoughts positive!
- The worse it gets the worse it gets. I know I will meet some resistance and so many swear by therapy. I do believe it has its place! I’ve been to a therapist myself and also participated in group therapy. I can for sure tell you it gave me clarity in certain areas. But it also didn’t lead to a healthier happier me. That came years later. It was when I stopped beating the proverbial drum of “what is” and feeling the need to dredge up the past that things got better for me. Now I’m forward thinking. I’m focused on how I want my life to be. I don’t feel the need to declare “what is” or bring up old school. That’s in the past. I’m quieter, but more content. I’m less popular, but I’m ok with that.
I follow the teachings of Abraham Hicks and I think this transcript from one of her conversations really paints a clear picture of what I’m trying to say:
“Things tipped when I stopped doing talk therapy. I stopped talking about my problems over and over and over. I don’t talk about my problems anymore and they just seem to not be there. And it’s weird ’cause it’s a woman thing – whoever has the biggest problem, you’re the winner. So I’m not very popular anymore. I have some really good problems, but I just don’t talk about them. Then the problem is that I’m not getting any attention, but I’m still having the problems and that’s the part that’s hard. I’m not getting the accolades of making it through.”
“Problems can be entertaining and more people relate to them.”
“People get you more when you’re complaining than when you’re not. There’s never a crowd on the leading edge.”
“Notice that movies and the news aren’t oriented to what’s uplifting. They want to keep your fears active and keep you coming back.”
“Show me a popular person and I’ll show you a complainer.” – Abraham Hicks
To sum it up, if you keep talking about your problems, you may get the positive outcome of popularity because people find you relatable. It’s easier to find mutuality with someone when they share their problems. People may like to hear about your troubles because it makes them feel better about their own lives. HOWEVER, each time you share those problems, each time you complain, be aware that you are no doubt going to bring more things to complain about – more problems – into your reality. That’s law of attraction.
Will you be friendless now? Absolutely not. Rest assured, you will attract others. Contentment and well being is also compelling and everyone is hungry for it. You will even likely attract the same people. The difference is that you will attract the best from them. ❤️