Tag: self-love

Designing Your Perfect Day
health · inspiration · personal development · self help · wisdom

Designing Your Perfect Day

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Designing your perfect day is one of the best choices you can make to bring joy into your life. It’s the idea that begins with simply making a list of all of the things you would do on your ideal, perfect day. All of your favorite things! This can be paper/pencil or on the Notes app of your phone. You can start as soon as today! I’m suggested here, to be clear, not only thinking about planning, but executing your perfect day! You can repeat this several times a year!

Consider making a promise to yourself this year is to take a day each month, just to focus on yourself – your wants, needs and dreams. This can be a weekday or a weekend, but just making sure to do it. We get so busy in the rush of life, that we forget to take care of ourselves. Before we know it, weeks, months and even years have passed and all of the hopes and vision we had for our life have been placed on hold. And we don’t even realize we’re doing it. We forget to do basic care and maintenance for our bodies. We forget to rest. Our health can suffer the consequences.

Taking one day each month can be a game changer. It gives you the PERMISSION and the OPPORTUNITY to stop and check in with what matters to you. There are some mindset shifts, exercises, processes and ideas that can help you to plan and execute this.

Mindset matters. On days like this, it can be easy to fall into the trap of doing work. If you are the workaholic, busy type like many of us are, it can be easy to take a day off for yourself, only to realize you spent it working or running errands. You have to be intentional and set boundaries. Don’t let yourself work and keep your mind set on this the entire day. Don’t check your email, and if possible, try and stay off your devices. Your only goal is to do what suits you! You are worthy and deserving of this.

To keep your perfect day centered around things you love and enjoy, there are several exercises you can use to remind yourself of your hobbies and interests, and processes that you will love to use for planning them. These processes can be done using the Notes app on your phone, Google Slides, or just using a pen and paper!

One of the best exercises you can implement using the Notes app of your phone. Create a note called “What matters to me.” Add a few things now that resonate, but continue to touch back and add to it as sort of an ongoing bulleted list for you. And along with that Note of things that matter to you, include a second Note called “my perfect day.” If you are more of a paper/pencil person, that works great too!

On your “my perfect day” Note, make a bucket list of all the things you would do on YOUR perfect day. Before you do, close your eyes and visualize yourself going through that day in the most delighted state imaginable. Elizabeth Gilbert shared an exercise for this on her podcast, where you close your eyes and visualize the most beautiful setting you can imagine, your favorite scent, the most delightful enjoyable sound, and the most cozy and satisfying fabric on your skin. For me, I’m at the beach viewing beautiful vistas at sunrise, listening to the waves crashing and the sound of birds, wearing my favorite fleece robe and smelling the aroma of my favorite coffee. When I did this exercise, it helped me know that being outdoors, enjoying coffee and watching the sunrise belong on that perfect day list. Close your eyes and go through each of your five senses and include the five things that come to your mind.

Another exercise that will help to design and plan your perfect day, is similar to creating a vision board. You open a blank Google slide and create a collage of images – things that you find are fun, that give you energy, or that are meaningful. Spend some time on this! Keep a tab open for this slide at all times so you can add to it and so that it’s always evolving. This exercise will help you to add other items to your perfect day list. Keeping a slide or list of the things that bring you joy will help you to be more intentional when you do take that day just for you. This helps make sure it isn’t wasted and that every second is spend on the things that make you happy!

Once you have a perfect day “bucket list” or Google slide vision board or both, don’t feel like you have to do all of the things, but instead use it as a way to be intentional and to inspire you. You will be excited the days and weeks leading up to your perfect day. It puts you in such a delightful planning state, trying to pick the exact activities that you think will bring you the most joy at that time. Become a perpetual LIST MAKER. Look over your Google slide, your bucket list, Notes on your phone and pick a few of those things, but always leave room for inspired action – to be spontaneous.

Your perfect day will include all of the things that bring you joy. Some ideas include going for a walk, treating yourself to your favorite coffee or smoothie, writing, yoga, sauna, have lunch with a friend, cast vision for your life, reading scriptures or positive quotes. Find quiet and solace in a bookstore or library and grab books filled with quotes and inspiration that fill your soul. You can also make sure on these days to schedule appointments that will make sure your body is as high functioning as it can be so that I will be strong and able bodied for your grandchildren and their children. Schedule an appointment with your therapist and at the chiropractor for these days. Healthy spine, healthy you. And seeing a therapist is what healthy people do. Seriously. It is so cathartic to feel truly heard and seen by someone. Lunch with your best friend can also serve this purpose.

When creating your list of things that bring your joy, be sure to incorporate visiting new places. It can be so inspiring to try new things and go on a short adventure. Go try that new restaurant for lunch that you’ve been dying to try. Anything life-giving. Outdoor walks. Time in the sunshine (vitamin D).

Consider what larger cities you live near. I live near Nashville, so love going to the zoo or Cheekwood or walking a trail at Radnor Lake, with NO TIME PRESSURE. I love simple things like going to Target at a time when it isn’t crowded or busy and I can linger on each aisle as long as I like (in particular I love the “good Target’) and Trader Joes on White Bridge Road in Nashville. I love Raising Cane’s. I love lattes and flat whites.

What does your perfect day look like? What aspects of designing a perfect day struck a chord with you? I hope this dive into designing your perfect day has inspired you to consider your own. Do you take days like this for yourself? What could you start putting into place so that you could incorporate days like this into your life? Do you see the value in it? Can you visualize it? Making lists of things that spark joy for you is a great place to start. Be intentional about scheduling days like this for yourself. Block them off on your calendar and stick to it. You will be so glad that you did.

Staying in Your Power
personal development · wisdom

Staying in Your Power

Essentially Better LivingLeave a comment

Last night, I fell asleep listening to an audio. Then when I woke up, the last few minutes of the next “recommended for you” was playing and ending. It was a two hour audiobook called The Power Is Within You.

It’s all about reclaiming your power, and that it’s all within your control. That is great news!

The author was abused herself as a child, and she begins by explaining that those of us who experienced abuse will subconsciously place ourselves in situations of abuse (hers was physical, mine mostly verbal.) She addressed how you can break this cycle and get back to a place of self-love, through forgiveness and sending love to those who have hurt you.

The book points you to self-love so that you can then love others. And to love yourself, you must use conscious language and be very aware of the words you speak, how you speak to yourself and to others.

It goes on to say you need to stop complaining and gossiping, because negative words bring more negativity into your your life. When you complain, criticize or gossip, when you are talking about others, your mind internalizes it as if you are speaking about YOURSELF. When you talk negatively about someone you need to ask yourself why you feel those things about yourself. The things we dislike in others are the things we don’t like about ourselves. Mic drop!

We often don’t think we deserve. This comes from our childhood, and our power comes from our deservability. What keeps us from feeling we deserve is typically someone else’s belief that we have accepted as truth. If we can let go of this misperception, we can return to our power.

Another part that resonated with me the most was what she had to say about guilt. Maybe you were made to feel like a burden as a child. As an adult this can make you feel like you’re bothering others, you’re in the way, or you’re inconveniencing someone whenever you need anything. Maybe you find yourself apologizing to others when you’ve done nothing wrong. This again points to a lack of deservability which is you trying to see yourself through someone else’s misperception. Stop that!

By dropping these old patterns and leaving your past behind you, you can move forward in your power. Your past does not serve you.

One of the main concepts she proposes is using affirmations and making sure the words you speak are positive. But she defines affirmations differently than what you might think. The traditional meaning of affirmation is a positive statement. Anything we speak is an affirmation and we reap the consequences of all words we speak, good or bad. The book is very law-of-attraction-ish and teaches that the words we speak come back to us some how in the way of experiences. We have to really pay attention to what we say!

I can’t recommend this book enough, whether you listen to the audiobook like I did or if you prefer to just read it. It came along for me at the perfect time. If you have been walking through lows related to past guilt, unworthiness, negativity or not feeling you are deserving, this book will give you the tools and knowledge you need to stay in your power!