Tag: boundaries

Achieve Work-Life Balance as a Teacher
health · inspiration · personal development · self help · teaching

Achieve Work-Life Balance as a Teacher

Essentially Better LivingLeave a comment

Over the years as a teacher, I have observed my colleagues stay at school way into the night hours, take stacks of work home, and complain they have no time for themselves or their families. Some even come to school to work on the weekends. They struggle with home-work balance, finding time to be a great parent, teacher, friend, family member. Their workload takes its toll on their mental and physical health. If there is a complement I consistently receive from other teachers, it’s that I have good home-work balance. Part of this stems from placing a priority on my inner peace above and beyond else, but there also are many habits and protocols I have put into place over the years to accomplish this. I realize there are countless blogs and posts on self care, but this one is for my teacher friends.

Set boundaries.

Teaching can consume all of your time if you allow it to. There is always something else to do! You have to start by setting some time boundaries. Now, I am not one of those teachers who spend all their time at school, but nor am I one who gets there at the last minute as buses are unloading and driving off as buses pull out. I come in an hour before kids and often stay an hour after my contracted day. I am motivated to be a great teacher and I love my students! But I also love my family and protecting and guarding my own mental and physical wellbeing. You will never look back ten years from now and think “I wish I spent more time at work,” but you may wish you spent more time with your family, chasing your dreams and taking care of your health.

When you’re thinking about setting time boundaries, set a time that you can be consistent with and agree with yourself that you will stop working and leave at that time daily. For me, the school day ends at 2:30 and I am committed to leave at 3:30. That is a personal time boundary to set for yourself that allows you to get your work done, but also have time for your family and for yourself.

You can’t pour from an empty cup.

You have also probably heard the expression that you can’t pour from an empty cup. Some of the things you should consider doing to fill your cup are:

  • Exercise (bonus points if this includes a yoga class once a week)
  • Go to a spa, get a massage, or go to the infrared sauna once a week (*stay tuned* – future post topic)
  • Allow yourself to indulge in a hobby whether that’s reading, writing, art, or playing an instrument
  • Get outside. Work in the garden. Take a neighborhood walk or go for a hike – make it a point to get outside and get some sunlight.
  • Make a point to go outside and get some sunlight EVERY DAY during your lunch break or planning at school. This helps your circadian rhythm and will help you sleep through the night. Hit me up in the comments if you want to know more about circadian rhythm or you can Google it.
  • Start taking a magnesium supplement. This will also help promote sleeping through the night.
  • Consider quitting drinking – that’s a whole different post.

My list is a little different than your typical “self-care list.” That’s because TRUE self care means taking care of yourself. Not filling yourself with gluten or breathing in artificial fragrance from scented candles. Not lounging on the couch for hours and binging shows. Not coming home and napping which disrupts your natural circadian rhythm and is no doubt the reason you can’t sleep at night.

Redefining self care.

While some think of self care as comfort, true self care means you’re improving your health and not detracting from it. True self care means taking care of yourself. If you get on Pinterest and type in “self care,” you’ll no doubt see suggestions like binging your favorite show, napping, having a glass of wine, enjoying your favorite comfort food or lighting scented candles (learn more about exposure to artificial fragrance here). However these all lower your immune system or interrupt your sleep. Take this challenge if you wouldn’t mind humoring me: list the things you do for self care and make a two column table beside it. Label one column “raises my immune system” and the second one “lowers.” If you go back and reread my list of self-care items, they are basically exercise, getting sunlight exposure, getting extra sleep during the night, and eating healthy. These all BOOST the immune system.

We find time (and energy) to do the things that matter to us.

If you are mentally pushing back, thinking how can you take a walk or exercise when you are exhausted from the school day, I hear you! Me too! But that’s the thing and the mindshift change you have to make. YOU GO ANYWAY. I rarely feel like going, but once I’m there I enjoy the routine and I feel AMAZING afterward. I think we mistakingly think of exercise as energy draining, but in actually it is life-giving! You will sleep so much better and you will feel so much stronger and more energized the next day. You will feel proud of yourself for doing it and more confident because your clothes will fit better.

Better sleep, better life.

The amount and quality of your sleep are paramount to your overall mental and physical health. Quality sleep belongs in this post because it’s a time boundary you need to set for yourself and a priority you have to set as well. Make sure that you are going to bed early enough to allow yourself the change to get 8 hours of sleep or rest. The big three that help me go to sleep and stay asleep are taking a magnesium gummy before bed (I like these), diffusing lavender and cedarwood in your bedroom, and temperature – keep your space cool and pile on extra blankets as needed. If you struggle with either going to sleep or staying asleep, I would encourage you to read my post on quality sleep, as there is much more to this than what I am sharing here.

Do your work at work (and how you can do this better.)

I VERY RARELY take any work home with me. The number one way I’m able to accomplish that is by setting planning, lunchtime and before/after school boundaries. In short, I close my door. Now a student here or there may need me and knock on my door, but for the most part, just by closing my door I’m able to work uninterrupted. This is not to be antisocial, but it gives me the time that is the topic of this entire post. I have also realized over the past few years as I have pinpointed my stressors and worked to minimize them, that interruptions are very high on the list. By setting the closed door boundary, I have minimized my interruptions, increased my productivity, and lowered my stress level.

Right or wrong, I eat in my classroom. I’m able to multi-task and get papers graded and recorded while I eat. My lunch is typically composed of finger food so it’s easy for me to be able to eat while I work. Then, as I mentioned earlier in this post, I make sure to get sunlight during this time. I set a timer to go off 8 minutes before students return. This gives me time to walk outdoors to the nicer faculty bathroom and wash my hands using nice hot water. There’s also a water bottle filling station there so I can refill my water bottle with ice and cold water.

Whether you are a teacher or not, a parent or not, the strategies and boundaries shared in this post can help anyone who is wanting to improve their sleep, energy, time management and quality of life. Please share your favorite tip in the comments and let me know if you have other suggestions for how teachers can set better boundaries and prioritize themselves.

Designing Your Perfect Day
health · inspiration · personal development · self help · wisdom

Designing Your Perfect Day

Essentially Better LivingLeave a comment

Designing your perfect day is one of the best choices you can make to bring joy into your life. It’s the idea that begins with simply making a list of all of the things you would do on your ideal, perfect day. All of your favorite things! This can be paper/pencil or on the Notes app of your phone. You can start as soon as today! I’m suggested here, to be clear, not only thinking about planning, but executing your perfect day! You can repeat this several times a year!

Consider making a promise to yourself this year is to take a day each month, just to focus on yourself – your wants, needs and dreams. This can be a weekday or a weekend, but just making sure to do it. We get so busy in the rush of life, that we forget to take care of ourselves. Before we know it, weeks, months and even years have passed and all of the hopes and vision we had for our life have been placed on hold. And we don’t even realize we’re doing it. We forget to do basic care and maintenance for our bodies. We forget to rest. Our health can suffer the consequences.

Taking one day each month can be a game changer. It gives you the PERMISSION and the OPPORTUNITY to stop and check in with what matters to you. There are some mindset shifts, exercises, processes and ideas that can help you to plan and execute this.

Mindset matters. On days like this, it can be easy to fall into the trap of doing work. If you are the workaholic, busy type like many of us are, it can be easy to take a day off for yourself, only to realize you spent it working or running errands. You have to be intentional and set boundaries. Don’t let yourself work and keep your mind set on this the entire day. Don’t check your email, and if possible, try and stay off your devices. Your only goal is to do what suits you! You are worthy and deserving of this.

To keep your perfect day centered around things you love and enjoy, there are several exercises you can use to remind yourself of your hobbies and interests, and processes that you will love to use for planning them. These processes can be done using the Notes app on your phone, Google Slides, or just using a pen and paper!

One of the best exercises you can implement using the Notes app of your phone. Create a note called “What matters to me.” Add a few things now that resonate, but continue to touch back and add to it as sort of an ongoing bulleted list for you. And along with that Note of things that matter to you, include a second Note called “my perfect day.” If you are more of a paper/pencil person, that works great too!

On your “my perfect day” Note, make a bucket list of all the things you would do on YOUR perfect day. Before you do, close your eyes and visualize yourself going through that day in the most delighted state imaginable. Elizabeth Gilbert shared an exercise for this on her podcast, where you close your eyes and visualize the most beautiful setting you can imagine, your favorite scent, the most delightful enjoyable sound, and the most cozy and satisfying fabric on your skin. For me, I’m at the beach viewing beautiful vistas at sunrise, listening to the waves crashing and the sound of birds, wearing my favorite fleece robe and smelling the aroma of my favorite coffee. When I did this exercise, it helped me know that being outdoors, enjoying coffee and watching the sunrise belong on that perfect day list. Close your eyes and go through each of your five senses and include the five things that come to your mind.

Another exercise that will help to design and plan your perfect day, is similar to creating a vision board. You open a blank Google slide and create a collage of images – things that you find are fun, that give you energy, or that are meaningful. Spend some time on this! Keep a tab open for this slide at all times so you can add to it and so that it’s always evolving. This exercise will help you to add other items to your perfect day list. Keeping a slide or list of the things that bring you joy will help you to be more intentional when you do take that day just for you. This helps make sure it isn’t wasted and that every second is spend on the things that make you happy!

Once you have a perfect day “bucket list” or Google slide vision board or both, don’t feel like you have to do all of the things, but instead use it as a way to be intentional and to inspire you. You will be excited the days and weeks leading up to your perfect day. It puts you in such a delightful planning state, trying to pick the exact activities that you think will bring you the most joy at that time. Become a perpetual LIST MAKER. Look over your Google slide, your bucket list, Notes on your phone and pick a few of those things, but always leave room for inspired action – to be spontaneous.

Your perfect day will include all of the things that bring you joy. Some ideas include going for a walk, treating yourself to your favorite coffee or smoothie, writing, yoga, sauna, have lunch with a friend, cast vision for your life, reading scriptures or positive quotes. Find quiet and solace in a bookstore or library and grab books filled with quotes and inspiration that fill your soul. You can also make sure on these days to schedule appointments that will make sure your body is as high functioning as it can be so that I will be strong and able bodied for your grandchildren and their children. Schedule an appointment with your therapist and at the chiropractor for these days. Healthy spine, healthy you. And seeing a therapist is what healthy people do. Seriously. It is so cathartic to feel truly heard and seen by someone. Lunch with your best friend can also serve this purpose.

When creating your list of things that bring your joy, be sure to incorporate visiting new places. It can be so inspiring to try new things and go on a short adventure. Go try that new restaurant for lunch that you’ve been dying to try. Anything life-giving. Outdoor walks. Time in the sunshine (vitamin D).

Consider what larger cities you live near. I live near Nashville, so love going to the zoo or Cheekwood or walking a trail at Radnor Lake, with NO TIME PRESSURE. I love simple things like going to Target at a time when it isn’t crowded or busy and I can linger on each aisle as long as I like (in particular I love the “good Target’) and Trader Joes on White Bridge Road in Nashville. I love Raising Cane’s. I love lattes and flat whites.

What does your perfect day look like? What aspects of designing a perfect day struck a chord with you? I hope this dive into designing your perfect day has inspired you to consider your own. Do you take days like this for yourself? What could you start putting into place so that you could incorporate days like this into your life? Do you see the value in it? Can you visualize it? Making lists of things that spark joy for you is a great place to start. Be intentional about scheduling days like this for yourself. Block them off on your calendar and stick to it. You will be so glad that you did.