Christmas carries so many amazing memories and traditions. In the past, it has been the most joyous time of year, especially when the girls were little and they could be delighted and content with the smallest and affordable items.
As they are getting older, bringing them the same amount of joy comes with a pretty high price tag – it just does. On a tight budget, I struggle with staying with in our means, and doing what I really want to do from the deepest part of my being: give them the things I know will make their hearts soar.
I went through a period where I felt I was unique this way. It seemed as though my friends and parents of my girls’ friends were not only providing their children with the things mine were asking for, but much more. Recently, as I’ve talked to other parents, they feel the same way I do!
I hear of children making Canva presentations of everything they want, hundreds and thousands of dollars worth of gift requests. And just yesterday, a friend posted on social that she had already bought for her child, and he presented her with a Santa letter listing totally different requests, none of which she had already purchased. One of the things he asked for was $1000! Social media seems to normalize overspending at Christmas.
I think where a lot of parents with younger children struggle is trying to keep the idea of Santa alive. I know I did. We wonder if our kids don’t get all they’ve asked for, especially in a Santa letter, will the magic stay alive? Will they still believe? And also the practical side of our brains that screams not only “no,” but “hell no!”
When I look back at gifts my girls have received over the years, and compare my excitement about their potential reaction to opening them to how they actually react, it’s almost always a letdown. Especially 2-3 days later. Gifts that I spent months planning and hundreds of dollars we didn’t have to spend – money that we sacrificed to hopefully put a smile on their face? Now they are items discarded in the corner ALREADY, not touched at all. Or opened and used but taken for granted.
Over time, I’ve tried to find a solution that keeps me in alignment with what I feel is right and reasonable, but bringing joy to my children at the holidays at the same time. Experiences as gifts is a good solution! Tangible items as gifts are kind of like buying a car. They lose value the second you pull out of the lot. Tangible gifts lose their joyfulness and importance with each day we possess the item. Experiences have sentimental value and give us memories that we treasure for a lifetime.
That is why this Christmas I don’t want a Santa letter or a Canva presentation. I’m not even looking at those. They can make them and use them as a list of items for them to save their money and purchase themselves. It’s good to have things that you want and hope for!
I will definitely be listening for ideas and looking for little items that I know will surprise and delight them! I love shopping for their stockings and it’s interesting that the small affordable stocking items always seem to bring bigger smiles than the high dollar gifts.
I will no longer be a parent who is a slave to the pressure of what the Joneses have or what the Joneses are getting for Christmas this year. I will no longer feel pressured to get all the things on my child’s wishlist in efforts to rescue them from a depression or to buy happiness. This never works anyways. My child very well may be literally the only one at her school who didn’t get the viral Nikes or Lululemon whatever, and you know what? She will be just fine.
Essentially Better Living 